Just as a disclaimer, I would like to state that I don’t want this to be one of those blogs where scientists complain about creationists/God/politics/whatever. If you want one of those, I’m sure you have many other options. Of course, that being said, here is a post about evolution, which always sparks a lot of anger between those who believe in evolution and those who believe in intelligent design or whatever it’s being called these days. It’s sort of a shame, really, because evolution is quite beautiful and the more you know about it, the more you can appreciate it.
But I really don’t care what you believe. My issue is that since such a huge part of the creationist rhetoric is teaching critical thinking by presenting alternative ideas and letting people decide for themselves what is right, I feel like what is presented as evolution should at least be accurate. Also it seems that if you have a science blog, posting about evolution at least once is somewhat obligatory. And this makes sense. Evolution has tied so much of biology together that it’s really pretty hard to avoid.
So anyway, I’ve been thinking about this a lot today because one argument against evolution keeps coming up over and over again, which is essentially…
“Why do we still have apes if we came from them?”
This is a recent quote from a Florida politician, but this video (poor quality, sorry) shows similar misunderstandings from not only Christine O’Donnell, but another guest and even the host himself. If this is the way most people believe evolution works, it is not acceptable.
So first I will try to clarify this one point, and then hopefully I can explain evolution in a new way so that it makes some more sense.
You did not come from a monkey, and whoever told you so was lying.
For whatever reason, humans seem to be awfully full of themselves in believing that monkeys somehow have this “goal” of achieving the status of human being. Either that or our attention spans are too short to consider the fact that the Earth is older than we can truly comprehend, and so instead we focus on amounts of time that we can understand (i.e. hundreds or thousands of years). The accumulation of changes necessary for the monkey/human divergence took millions of years, so maybe it’s just that people don’t think about looking that far back.
But if you did, this is essentially what evolution is describing:
So no, we did not come from monkeys. But we do share a common ancestor with them. This divergence occurred millions of years ago. Monkeys are not “behind” humans in evolution, and they are not “evolving towards” us. They are just monkeys, evolving in their own direction. And we are just humans, evolving in our own direction.
There are probably thousands upon thousands of websites out there with the purpose of clarifying some common misconceptions about evolution. Originally I intended to make this post one of those “this is what people say, and here’s how it’s wrong!” but those are boring and, frankly, overdone. So instead, I will try to explain some general concepts of evolution using a metaphor I think most people can appreciate.
So let’s say you have survived a zombie apocalypse. Congratulations! Your brains are not someone’s breakfast, and that’s an impressive accomplishment. But zombies have a pretty sizable appetite, and soon they will be coming for you. So what do you do?
Well, you have a few options. First, you can hide. Maybe you found a nice abandoned warehouse with tons of vitamin-fortified cereal or something and you decide to just stay put. Zombies probably hate cereal (no one makes brain-fortified cereal anyway), and if you’re really quiet and sneaky when you absolutely have to leave your warehouse, you might just live a pretty decent life. This is a respectable choice. I love cereal personally, so this is probably what I would do.
But maybe that’s not your style, so you say to yourself, “Self, are you just going to let a little zombie problem control your life? No, I didn’t think so.” And what do you do? You go out expecting a fight. And you go well armed. This is a little more proactive than sitting and hiding, though it comes with its own risks as well. Let’s follow this choice for the rest of the post, mostly because it’s a little more exciting.
There is also a third choice, however. This would be the bad choice. Valid, but bad. This would be the choice you make when you decide that you just can’t bring yourself to leave your home because you have been there for so many years and put so much time into it that you just can’t possibly leave and… well. Unless you live in a fortress, you probably present very little challenge to a zombie. Zombies love to break doors and windows to stick their hands in and grab you. They’d be quite pleased with your decision, but the same can’t be said for you. I’m sure you would make a tasty zombie snack in no time.
In this example, zombies are exerting what is known as selective pressure on you (and the rest of humanity).

After your initial flee of terror, let’s take the second route — the one where you arm yourself because you do not appreciate being chased off by zombies. But it’s the day after the apocalypse and you have no guns or anything else to speak of. What do you do?
Well, first you meet up with two other survivors by chance. This is almost required for experiencing a proper zombie apocalypse.
So the three of you decide to search for weapons together, and eventually you stumble upon a little stash tucked away in an abandoned shed. For the sake of argument, you can only choose one weapon, and once you do, you cannot put it down or choose another one. And it’s dark. So you each pick one up at random. The first person picks a revolver, but it’s unloaded and there is no ammo for it in the shed. The second person picks up a flamethrower, fully fueled, with no idea how to use it. You pick up a pistol and stumble over tons of ammo for it. Victory! The three of you are now armed, though not equally.
These weapons represent random mutations that may occur once an organism is exposed to selective pressure, and each mutation may be varying degrees of helpfulness against said selective pressure. I just want to emphasize the random part here. An organism cannot decide to mutate — it just does. Some regions of DNA have higher chances of being mutated, while others have lower chances of being mutated. I can discuss this in another post maybe. But for now, we’ll stick with this. Silent mutations effectively do nothing. This is a mutation which does not change the genetic code in any way due to redundancy built into the central dogma (each amino acid may have anywhere from 2-4 codons that encode it). Harmful mutations change a gene in such a way that it may become detrimental or even lethal to the organism. These usually do not make it to future generations. The last type, beneficial mutations, will change a gene in such a way that the organism receives some benefit from the change.
Or, to summarize:

So the three of you, now armed, continue on your way to find some shelter or maybe food. You encounter several zombies on the way to wherever you go. The person with the flamethrower, having no idea what he is doing, promptly sets himself on fire and burns to a crisp. You must leave him behind. The person with the unloaded gun has no specific advantage, but maybe he is a fast runner, so you two manage to escape most of the zombies just fine.
But then, just as you are about to reach your destination, you encounter a whole bunch of zombies at once! There are at least thirty of them, backing you up into a corner and trying to bite you! With nowhere to run and no means of defense, the person with the unloaded gun cannot rely on his speed any longer, and he is quickly devoured by the frenzied mob. And then it is only you. You, your gun, and your ammo. In a rush of adrenaline, you are able to kill or maim all the zombies, run to safety, and live another day. Good for you!
The zombies have forced you to change yourself by trying to hunt and eat you. To change yourself, you decided to become armed. Your weapon was chosen at random, but fortunately for you, it turned out to be a beneficial weapon. With this new weapon that the zombies could not overcome, you were able to escape. You have won the game.
In nature, it works somewhat similarly. I mean, obviously there are some issues with this metaphor, as there will be with any metaphor. But essentially, it is the same track. An organism is disturbed by a change of some factor in its environment (predation, pathogen, chemical, temperature), and it needs to adapt in order to continue to survive. Mutations (occurring at random) may affect the organism’s ability to deal with these types of stress. Those individuals who undergo beneficial mutations will have an advantage over those with harmful (or even silent) mutations, and thus they will be more likely to thrive in their changing environment.
When these small changes in an organism add up over years and years of adapting to its surrounding environment, that organism may have accumulated enough mutations so it is different from what it was before all those changes occurred. And maybe another member of the same kind of organism took another route — maybe it decided to hide instead of becoming armed, and now it is successful in its own and different way. This is known as speciation. Each new organism, derived from the original species, has taken alternate routes to continue to survive. Neither is necessarily better than the other. They’re just different.
Now the really interesting part in our little example is if a zombie starts to get smart. I know this probably wouldn’t happen because zombies have little to no cognitive function, but for the sake of argument…
Yeah. Now what are you going to do? There are armed zombies. And they are coming for you right as you thought you might be able to get comfortable.
This is known as the evolutionary arms race, or the Red Queen Hypothesis. You’re just going to have to keep running faster and faster in order to stay in the same place and avoid becoming zombie chow. Doesn’t seem fair, does it?
But hey, that’s life.